College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I've blown a few things in my day
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
