i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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