you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
