The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
