we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
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