That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
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