u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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