is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
