Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize