Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
God, I missed his penis.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
