bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
How external is "for external use only"?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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