Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
