brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
