Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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