Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize
