The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
