Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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