Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
