found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
