when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
