I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
