It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
