I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
