Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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