The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
