Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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