first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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