How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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