Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
