There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
