About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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