So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You are the jesus of drinking
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
