Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
