I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I intend to get homeless drunk
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
How's work?
Spinning.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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