We should be called the Road Head Warriors
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
