that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
