I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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