Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
