Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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