I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
