just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize