Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
