I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I just saw a hot homeless man
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
