How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
