We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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