just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
