We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
