apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Randomize
