You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
