Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
